A letter for mama

I often hear from people, “I could never talk to my mom about sex.” And believe me, I get that. My mom never gave me the green light to use tampons or shave my thighs. We could talk about everything in this world except sex. But, all that changed last year when my eyes were opened to how menopause affects our sexual health – the toll it takes both emotionally and physically – and I wanted to know my mom was okay.

This Mother’s Day, I challenge you to get over the weirdness. For her sake, and yours. 

I’ve been blown away by how many women in my life have come forward saying they want to give the gift of Tabu to their moms but just don’t know how to set the stage. To help, I went ahead and wrote a little letter for all the daughters looking out for their mamas out there. Maybe she’s recently single, maybe she’s been married 30+ years, maybe you have no idea if she’s experiencing menopausal symptoms. Whatever the case, her sexual health matters. And chances are she’s writing it off too soon.

Edit, redraft, or copy / paste – just be sure to use code MOM at checkout for 25% off The Kit

With love, 

Dear (Mom, Momma, Mama, Mommy, Ma)

This may come as a surprise but hear me out. 

This Mother’s Day, I want to talk to you about sex. 

I don’t want any details (about you and dad / your partner). Really. Ever. But, recently I’ve learned how prevalent, serious, and isolating the sexual health side effects of menopause can be and that far too many women give up on this important part of their lives too soon (50% of women in their 50s to be exact). I know that if there was something this important to my physical and emotional well-being you would talk to me about it. No matter how uncomfortable it may be. So, here we go! 

Here’s what I’ve learned:

  • Your health: From reduced stress and better sleep to lower blood pressure and a decreased risk of heart disease – sexual wellness is an important part of our overall health. And, it turns out, the benefits can get even better with age. From peri-to post-menopause, regular sexual activity – with or without a partner – can strengthen your vaginal muscles, improve natural lubrication, reduce incontinence, and more. (I also recently learned what 'incontinence' means...why don't people talk about this more?!)
  • Your happiness: Self-care means your whole self. Women who honor and nurture their sexuality later in life report improved overall happiness in their personal and romantic relationships.

  • Your confidence: Due to shame or embarrassment, 75% of women don’t seek help for the sexual health side effects of menopause even though up to 90% of us will experience symptoms. Whatever you’re feeling, you’re not alone, and you have a whole lot of life left to live (with as much s-e-x as you wish).

This kit from Tabu (appropriately named, right?) is designed to honor and celebrate sexual wellness as we age with the tools and information to make it feel as natural as our skin and exercise routines. It was actually designed by a woman in her 30s after a conversation with her mom. 

I can only imagine what you’re thinking right now, but I hope you know just how much you mean to me. After learning about all this recently, I realized I couldn’t let a little legacy taboo get in the way of looking out for your health and well-being.

All my love, 
Your daughter

PS - we tend to hit menopause at about the same age as our mamas. So, if you’re willing, I’d love to know what I’m in for (minus the nitty gritty details of your sex life, of course ;).

Coffee date next week?